~_~

Nobody fits what I wish, No body conceals what I miss!

That nobody to say is me. I am a nobody. A nobody to this mob. To my own surveillance, I happen to deceive. The deception, that is me. My own self. I say, I have a history that I don’t want to repeat. The history whose existence is remote to me. Quite out of my own memory. I don’t have even a hint of it. I say, I have a future, I don’t wish to foresee. I have a future, that is uncertain as like every other fellow human’s. I have said and unsaid so many things all at the same time. I have hid myself, god knows where, when I am in dire need of that self. And I have unraveled so many things, when in fact it would have been better left tangled. If only I could ensconce myself from these unpredictable sides of me, I would be much less disgusted. I would not make out a history, which hardly, barely exists, nor would care for the future that is quite unsure. I would prefer to live in the obscurity of moment, if I could succumb to the mystery of my soul. It would be a better liberation than this lethal and unexplainable fear of one’s own self.